Getting a steady stream of leads through referrals can’t be done with a quick magic trick. Those referrals are the result of clear positioning, consistent follow-up, and a lot of patience. If you’ve never had much luck with referrals, it’s usually because there isn’t a plan behind them; if you’re willing to put some work in, let’s fix that.

#1. Know your angle before you talk to people

The quickest way to kill a referral opportunity is to be vague about what you do. If you walk into a conversation and say something forgettable like “I do websites” or “I’m in marketing,” you’re giving people nothing to hold on to.

Before any networking call, meeting, or casual chat, think about the angle that makes sense in that context. You need more than a single elevator pitch that covers everything; you want different angles to position yourself, and pick the one that’s most relevant.

That angle might be:

• Certification or specialisation – “I’m a certified StoryBrand consultant” or “I build Squarespace websites.”
• Niche – “I mostly work with nature conservation organisations” or “most of our clients are accountancy firms”
• Service – “I own a small content agency” or “we produce podcasts”
• Unique detail – “I’ve been building sites for over 20 years,” or “I mostly work in Italian.”
• Or a mix of some or all of the above!

Think about it this way: if you’re in a room full of HubSpot specialists, saying “I build HubSpot websites” doesn’t make you stand out. But saying “I work with health and wellness clinics” helps your fellow Hubspot people understand who to connect you with, especially if they work with a different type of client. And if you’re talking to a brand designer who works in health and wellness, you’d want to lead with the fact you also work in that industry – and your skills could be complementary to theirs.

The more specific and relevant you are to the person you’re talking to, the easier it is for people to remember you – and to refer to you later on.

#2. Actually talk about what you do

Knowing your angle is useless if you never actually communicate it. This sounds obvious, but you’d be amazed how many people attend the same online calls or meetings month after month, and still don’t know exactly what the others actually do. Everyone is friendly, they chat about specific topics or troubleshoot certain issues, but they never share the kind of information that would lead to referrals.

That’s why it’s not enough to know your value. You have to say it out loud — in a way that feels natural and not sleazy. Don’t assume people know what you do just because you see them regularly. They might have missed or forgotten your initial introduction – or there may never have been one to begin with!

There are a few approaches that work well:

The introduction method: Build your positioning into your introduction. “Hi, I’m John and I build HubSpot websites for health and wellness clinics.” Direct and simple, but you only get to introduce yourself once.

The example method: It’s easier to bring it up through examples: when talking about work, mention an example with just enough details for the other person to learn more about what you do. E.g. when someone asks about your day, you might say “I redesigned a website for a client” (fine, but vague) – or you might say “I redesigned a Squarespace website for a naturopathic clinic.” People remember those details.

The question-first approach: If you’re not sure how to bring it up, start by asking the other person what they do. Most people will naturally return the question; and as a bonus, people are much more receptive to hearing about your work when they’ve just shared theirs.

Make it a habit to weave your expertise into conversations naturally. Even if you speak to the same person regularly, ask them about a recent success or what they’re working on right now – and share yours with them too. Done right, this will keep you “top of mind” when the other person needs someone like you – and the other way around! 

Example: coworking, planning workshops, round tables

As you may know, we host weekly coworking sessions, monthly planning workshops, as well as regular round table conversations. We always open the room 10-15 minutes before start, so that people can connect before we dive into the topic of the day.

Examples:

• On the weekly coworking “power hour”, we ask everyone to share what they’re working on today. And some even like to put the list of what they want to accomplish in that one hour in the chat. Attendees could simply say they’ll be working on “client work” or “a blog post”, or they may mention that they’re “writing an article about disability benefits for a healthcare provider” or “setting up a series of email automations for a small non-profit’s upcoming online summit”. This gives other attendees some insights into the type of work you’d typically take on.
• The monthly planning workshop always starts with a round of “share last month’s wins”. An attendee could say they’re happy they managed to “reach all their goals for last month”, or they could mention that they’ve “launched three new WordPress websites and closed a return client for some additional SEO work”. Makes all the difference.
• Our round table conversations usually center around a specific topic (and for some reason, AI is often part of that topic). You might be tempted to stay in the background and listen rather than talk, or you could ask a question or present a particular challenge to the group. When you do, include some details, like the type of client or project this is for!

#3. Invest your time where it counts

Referrals can come from anywhere,  but some connections are far more likely to send them your way than others. If you’d like to be more strategic about who you want to get to know, the best referral sources are usually:

• People with complementary services. For example, if you’re a copywriter, web designers, brand strategists, and business coaches are great connections. Their clients often need someone like you, but you don’t compete directly.
• People serving the same audience with a different service. For instance, if you talked about a podcast you produced for an accountancy firm, you may hear from a webdesigner whose clients (also accountants!) are looking to launch a new podcast. 
• People with special network-building skills. You know who they are: that person who’s always bringing people together, tagging others on social media (“You need this? You should talk to my friend here!”), they’re natural connectors. 
• People who are fully booked. Especially with solo service providers and small agencies, this happens a lot; they simply don’t have the bandwidth for more or bigger clients, and they’re happy to refer to their “competition” when someone new comes along.
• People who come right before you in your ideal client’s journey. Who do they typically work with before or while they work with you? Those service providers are often your strongest referral partners.

That said, keep your “referral-searching hat” on at all times. Some of your best clients will come from completely unexpected sources. The accountant you met at a Chamber of Commerce mixer or at a wedding might not seem like an obvious referral source, but three months later, they might mention your services to a client who desperately needs what you offer.

#4. Turn competition into collaboration

When you find yourself with people who seemingly do the same thing you do, that doesn’t necessarily mean they’re your competition. Instead of discarding them as potential connections, get curious about what makes each of you different.

Ok, if you own a large agency that offers everything from branding and marketing to PR to all types of clients, and you talk with another similar agency owner… while you may learn a lot from each other, it’s unlikely they will send you referrals – or vice versa. 

If you own a large agency, you may benefit from connecting with coaches, consultants, and smaller service providers who share your ideal client type; those who simply don’t offer all the services you do, and often need someone to help their clients implement the strategy they’ve just set or to take over after they’ve built some foundations. 

Smaller, specialised agencies and consultants rarely compete directly, even when they offer similar services. There are almost always differences in approach, client type, timeline, included services, or target market.

Maybe you both build websites for healthcare companies, but they focus on large hospital systems while you work with private practices. Or perhaps their core offer is a one-week website build while you spend the first month of a project on strategy only. Maybe they expect clients to provide their own copy and brand assets, while your service menu includes copywriting and basic branding.

Those details matter. Someone might come to you with a tiny budget and a rush deadline; perfect for your “competitor”, but not for you. If you can make the introduction, you’ve done both parties a favour, and that goodwill often comes back your way.

#5. Stay top of mind without being pushy

Referrals are a slow-burn strategy. People rarely have a perfect referral for you right when they meet you. More often, they’ll think of you weeks or months later when they encounter someone who needs your services – if they remember you.

 That means you need to stay visible in a light, consistent way.

One of the easiest ways is through whatever platform the people you want to stay in touch with use most; LinkedIn, or maybe a Slack or Circle community. Make it a habit to interact with their content, and post something yourself regularly too. Small interactions keep you on people’s radar.

Another simple tactic is the quarterly check-in. Every few months, send a quick message to your key contacts. Ask how things are going, share one or two lines about what you’ve been up to, and that’s it; no pitch. It’s just a way of keeping the connection alive so they don’t forget about you.

The important part is having a system. Whether it’s a CRM, a spreadsheet, or even a notebook, keep track of:

• how you met someone,
• what they do,
• any relevant details they mentioned, and
• when you last reached out.

Set yourself a reminder to review your contacts regularly so no one falls through the cracks. Staying top of mind doesn’t take much effort if you build it into your routine.

#6. Track what’s working

If you want referrals to become a real strategy instead of random luck, start measuring where they actually come from. Every time a new lead comes in, note who referred them, how you met that person, and what kind of networking activity led to the relationship.

Over time, patterns will appear. You might notice that most of your referrals come from a specific networking group, or from relationships you built at industry events, or from a handful of service providers in a related field. Once you see what’s working, you can double down there instead of spreading yourself thin.

It’s equally useful to notice what isn’t working. If you’ve been attending a weekly networking call for six months and you haven’t had a single client come out of it, it may be time to step back.

You don’t need a complicated dashboard. Just track enough to answer questions like:

• Where do your leads come from? How many of those are referrals? 
• Where are most of your referrals coming from? Which activities or people? 
• What is the referral-to-client conversion rate on each of those? 

Don’t overthink it – you just need enough data to make informed decisions about where to spend your energy.

#7. Give referrals to get referrals

One of the fastest ways to become top of mind for others is to be the person who connects them with opportunities. If you’re known for making good introductions, people are far more likely to think of you when they meet someone who could use your services.

The key word here is good. Maintain a virtual (or actual) rolodex of trusted service providers in adjacent areas. Don’t recommend anyone you wouldn’t trust yourself, as your reputation is attached to every referral you make. 

When you introduce people to each other, don’t just send someone some contact details and wish them the best – introduce them directly (often in the form of an email). E.g. “Sarah, meet Tom. Tom is looking for help with his weekly show, and I immediately thought of you. Tom, Sarah produces podcasts for several coaches and consultants and does fantastic work.” Both will appreciate and remember the warm introduction. 

Following up is just as important. Check in later to see if the introduction was helpful. It shows you care and helps you learn which referrals work out well, so you can get even better at connecting people in the future.

When you become known as a generous referrer, people start thinking of you first when they have a new opportunity. It’s relationship-building gold.

#8. Ask for referrals without feeling sleazy

At some point, you may want to explicitly ask for referrals. The mistake people make is asking too soon or too vaguely. “Let me know if you hear of anyone who needs marketing help” won’t get you new leads.

The right time to ask is after you’ve built some trust; maybe you’ve known the person for a while, worked together, or referred them business yourself. Another good time is right after the first meeting; send people an email to follow up. 

This could work: “I’ve really enjoyed getting to know you and learning about your business. I’m always looking to connect with more [ideal client description]. If you ever encounter [specific situation], I’d love to meet them – even if it’s not a fit for working together, I enjoy talking with business owners who are [relevant challenge/goal].”

When you ask, be specific: “I’m looking to meet more health and wellness clinic owners who are frustrated with their website conversion rates. If you come across anyone like that, I’d appreciate an introduction.”

Notice the difference: You’re not demanding leads, you’re simply asking to be connected with people who fit a clear description. It feels collaborative, not transactional.

Sometimes (and depending on who you’re asking), it may even be useful to not ask for a direct referral – but instead ask for more connections. E.g. “I’m looking to meet coaches and consultants who work with health and wellness clinics”. If you know most of your referrals come from coaches and consultants who work with your ideal clients, then connecting with more of those “ideal referrers” could yield more results over time than getting a single client referral. 

You can also offer reciprocity: “I’m looking to connect with more accounting firms who work with small businesses. And if you ever need intros to a great designer or copywriter, I know a few excellent people.”

The key is making the ask feel natural, collaborative, and specific enough to be actionable.

#9. Avoid the common mistakes

Even if you do everything else right, a few missteps can quickly shut down referral opportunities. Here are the big ones:

• Being too vague. If people don’t know who you serve or don’t understand what it is you do exactly, they can’t think of anyone to send your way. Clarity beats broadness every time.
• Slow follow-up. If someone introduces you to a potential client, respond immediately to say thanks and confirm you’ll reach out. Delays make both you and the referrer look bad.
• Forgetting to thank people. Always close the loop. A quick “Thanks again for connecting me with Tom, we had a great call” goes a long way. If the referral turns into a client, consider sending a small thank-you gift or even a commission if that’s common in your industry.
• Treating people like lead machines. Referrals work on relationships, not transactions. If you only reach out when you want something, people notice.
• Only networking when you need work. Building a referral system is a long game. If you wait until your pipeline is empty, you’re already too late.
• Asking for referrals you can’t serve well. If you ask for referrals but then either turn them down or provide poor service, you’ll damage your referral relationships. Instead, when they send you someone who’s not a good fit, take some time to provide the referred with feedback and tell them why that’s not the type of client you’re looking for. 
• Undercutting referral partners. If someone refers business to you and you start poaching their clients or offering overlapping services, that bridge is burned. Protect trust at all costs.

Avoiding these mistakes is often more important than perfecting your networking technique. Referral relationships are built on trust and mutual benefit – protect that foundation carefully.

Putting it all together

Referrals aren’t about luck, and they’re not about pushing people to give you leads.

A good referral strategy is all about 

1. Being clear about what you do and who you’re looking to connect with
2. Building genuine relationships
3. Creating simple habits that keep you top of mind and that make people want to refer business to you. 

Decide how you want to position yourself, say it out loud, and actively connect with people who are likely to send you business. Be generous with your own referrals. Track things so no one falls through the cracks. Ask for introductions when the time is right. And avoid the shortcuts and mistakes that damage trust.

Do that consistently, and you’ll find referrals become your best, most sustainable source of new clients.